He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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