I want to make a zoo with you.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Randomize
