Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Randomize
