Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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