I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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