worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
You were trust falling into bushes
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
