Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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