can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
