What a fucking waste of an outfit
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize