Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
