end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Randomize
