i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
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