when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
