operation harelip BJ is a go
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
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