Sponge bath it is.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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