I cockslap morals
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
