Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US