the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize