Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Randomize