If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.