I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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