Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
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Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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