I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
He shit in the fireplace
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