my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
