The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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