My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
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the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
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