Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
