we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
NoShamevember. You game?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
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