Four minutes until I can fart!
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize