Texts From Last Night

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  (678): View more from Georgia

  What are you drinking?

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL

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  (678): What are you drinking? (404): Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL http://tfl.nu/iqly
  Replies (54) Good night (1554) Bad night (2580)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair

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  (563): even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair http://tfl.nu/e78g
  Replies (82) Good night (4272) Bad night (948)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.

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  (207): She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird. http://tfl.nu/49lo
  Replies (20) Good night (7701) Bad night (2038)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.

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  (678): I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life. http://tfl.nu/5bor
  Replies (17) Good night (4585) Bad night (847)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!

  (1-804): View more from Virginia

  Wait are they playing beer pong to?

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  (804): there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule! (1-804): Wait are they playing beer pong to? http://tfl.nu/dq3n
  Replies (13) Good night (4651) Bad night (1072)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.

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  (703): Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college. http://tfl.nu/9le9
  Replies (14) Good night (6796) Bad night (785)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  ..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making

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  (703): ..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making http://tfl.nu/m2re
  Replies (10) Good night (3412) Bad night (883)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.

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  (484): We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us. http://tfl.nu/883t
  Replies (4) Good night (1748) Bad night (521)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.

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  (330): Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me. http://tfl.nu/h3wh
  Replies (3) Good night (1434) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.

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  (210): I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful. http://tfl.nu/5n8j
  Replies (7) Good night (1843) Bad night (735)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...

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  (401): All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage... http://tfl.nu/w66w
  Replies (3) Good night (1126) Bad night (500)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option

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  (253): My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option http://tfl.nu/xa3f
  Replies (11) Good night (764) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.

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  (760): I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite. http://tfl.nu/b3g6
  Replies (1) Good night (1269) Bad night (605)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?

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  (208): Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going? http://tfl.nu/zcy2
  Replies (0) Good night (335) Bad night (641)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.

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  (480): Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now. http://tfl.nu/9q96
  Replies (0) Good night (318) Bad night (265)

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