Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting http://tfl.nu/19oh
  Replies (20) Good night (2337) Bad night (782)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to http://tfl.nu/s30p
  Replies (154) Good night (4052) Bad night (935)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse. http://tfl.nu/mns9
  Replies (13) Good night (770) Bad night (4414)
• Favorite

  (915): View more from Texas

  like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (915): like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on http://tfl.nu/aizw
  Replies (7) Good night (4416) Bad night (1018)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off. http://tfl.nu/ypig
  Replies (27) Good night (5965) Bad night (1033)
• Favorite

  (361): View more from Texas

  I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (361): I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about? http://tfl.nu/lnao
  Replies (15) Good night (4479) Bad night (1336)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking. http://tfl.nu/k8z0
  Replies (4) Good night (2029) Bad night (555)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them. http://tfl.nu/ibul
  Replies (5) Good night (3472) Bad night (623)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it. http://tfl.nu/oche
  Replies (8) Good night (1797) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  I can't answer my phone I'm at work

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (339): I can't answer my phone I'm at work (781): I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities http://tfl.nu/qhjl
  Replies (5) Good night (1738) Bad night (516)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY. http://tfl.nu/l84n
  Replies (2) Good night (810) Bad night (433)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open http://tfl.nu/p54l
  Replies (2) Good night (579) Bad night (317)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.

  (309): View more from Illinois

  May the force be with you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died. (309): May the force be with you. http://tfl.nu/776r
  Replies (4) Good night (1116) Bad night (365)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (256): I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen http://tfl.nu/i9fp
  Replies (1) Good night (844) Bad night (254)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus. http://tfl.nu/e88p
  Replies (4) Good night (983) Bad night (355)

Randomize