Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(901): View more from Tennessee

All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.

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(415): View more from California

apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window

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(315): View more from New York

I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(703): View more from Virginia

I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment

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(307): View more from Wyoming

I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.

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(448): View more from

sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?

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