sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
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