Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Operation Purity has been aborted
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Randomize
