Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
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A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
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Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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