You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize