I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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