I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I just want nice things and good sex
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize
