Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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