I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
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