White coat. Heels.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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