If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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