How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize