Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize