Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize