she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
