I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Randomize
