it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
