i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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