He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
