cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize