I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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